Crunchy Muppets

Muppets love snack foods.
Muppets love to eat.
If it's in the office, and it's edible, they'll eat it.
If it's here and it's questionable, I can think of at least a few of them (Pepe the King Prawn) who will eat it anyway.
They're not big on bringing snacks, but if you have snacks here, they're all over it like ants at a picnic.

Here in the front office of the Muppet Daily News, we have a pretzel jug.
It's a big, clear plastic jug that was originally filled with little pretzels. They were quickly consumed but we keep the jar.

Periodically it gets refilled.
"Periodically" means "When I do it."
Because, evidently, I am the only person at the Muppet Daily News legally allowed to buy Utz Sourdough Special Extra Dark pretzels.
It must be a law or something.. because either I buy them or the jar stays empty while the Muppets walk by, gazing at it longingly.
Or, in Pepe's case, eating the crumbs and grains of salt out of the bottom of the jar.
(Yes, he really does that.)

I'm not exaggerating.
In the six months since the Muppets became addicted to those pretzels, not one single Muppet has ever bought a bag.
Not one.
Ever.

When they whine ... and oh how they can whine ... I point out that these super-duper exclusive pretzels are available at Wawa, SuperFresh, Acme, Shop-Rite and that any of them can feel free to bring a bag or two in and add them to the jar.

Nope. Hasn't happened yet.

I did fill the jar Monday. Two bags of the magic Utz pretzels will fill the jar nearly to the top.
I poured two bags in Monday morning.
It's more than half-empty already.
It's only Tuesday afternoon.

I hope they're pacing themselves, or storing away pretzels like squirrels store acorns, because this is it for October.
They can bring in more or they can starve.
I'll get some of my own, and bring single servings, in little Zip-Loc baggies, each day, just to torment them.
Poor hungry Muppets.